Monthly Archives: July 2011

Highly recommended Hayes

I just snagged this off of Amazon and I’m really digging it.

Some jackass came into the Bitter Old Man Bar during my Slightly Not Unhappy Hour and loaded up the jukebox with typical San Antonian head-banging, meth-smoking, tattoo-getting head-banging bullshit. Gave me a headache, ruined my whole Friday. So, I’m listening to a pothead from Dallas, but at least he plays music with a recognizable pedigree.

Here, I know I got the go-stick over here

It’s really the only reason I maintain this. I love my pards, Otis, Dick, Teddy, Diller, etc.

Includes dogs, airplanes, trains, motorcyles, and raucous good-time music:

It’s a very simple world, and we do our best to complicate the hell out of it.

Neither of those are bands are from Texas.

Simply can’t wait for tomorrow!

Dear @PalinEmails,

Tomorrow is your one-month anniversary. I can’t wait to read all the horrible nasty things that dumb snowbilly harridan did. I’m sure you’ve been saving them up for a big, splashy, all-points-of-the-media-compas​s reveal, right? Since I haven’t heard a peep anywhere about anything. I admire your dogged lock-down, I do…that’s not easy to do in this krazy over-konnected age.

Cross-posted on FailBook…

I’ll add, here: I do sincerely detest the retarded liberal progressive ass-licker bozos that populate our media landscape. But you, dear reader, already know that.

Wasserman-Jingleheimer-Smith-Schultz Watch: Episode, like, the fourth

The lunatic DNC women gets another story in the press that’s popular with the navel-gazers:

When President Barack Obama selected Florida Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz to lead the Democratic National Committee, she was hailed as the best pick he could make.

Since her election to Congress, Wasserman Schultz has quickly earned a reputation as a partisan warrior and strong cable news presence who could effectively put Republicans on their heels. Being both a woman and from the battleground state of Florida didn’t hurt either.

But, like “The Hangover Part II,” Wasserman Schultz hasn’t quite lived up to her billing.

See, that there’s not playing fair to The Hangover &c. Franchise. That woman is a nut. I personally, as a blogger, hope they keep her crazy Florida ass going. That’s what Miami will do to you if you let them…they elected a loon, and there’s a gajillion more where she came from, all of them as dumb as a bag of doorknobs.

I love her so much, I want to marry her (sans pre-nup) so I can get some crazy Progressive cash in the settlement. I’ll start a wind-farm, like T. Bone…no, a cow-fart farm, since that’s as reliable as wind.

Actually, that was decided for the governor, long before he ever showed his face

Should Texas Execute a Mexican? Rick Perry Will Decide

The answer to your dipstick question is — yes, unquestionably, and no, Rick Perry did not decide…Texas voters have decided, over and over and over and over. Sadly for the ex-Sr. Leal, there is not a lot of leeway for teenager-raping, teenager-raping individuals, regardless of their status as foreign nationals, in the state I have called home for 51 years.

Should any of you assholes in the media ever stumble across an American who has been proven beyond a shadow of a doubt to have raped and murdered a teenager, I will be happy to step up and put the Texas bullet in said perpetrator’s brain, so as to absolve the host nation of their responsibility to the rest of humanity.

Finally back to division play

Agin the Oakland Athletics, tonight, finally. Pitching for the As is Rich Harden, last seen in these parts after blowing up & then being launched into the sun by Jon Daniels. Somehow, he figured out the controls, avoided catastrophic quantum dis-assembly, and landed back in Oakland.

For the hometown 9, we get golden boy Derek Holland, who I have yet to figure out. My only suggestion to him would be to take off all the damn necklaces, get a glove with no cutesy nicknames stitched on it, and bear the f–k down.

All this excitement, just in time for the three-day All Star power-down. The last few weeks have been tough to follow with all the soul-destroying interleague play vs. such fierce rivals as the Florida Marlins, and uhhhh, I forget. Oh, yeah — the Disastros. Well, there is hope for regaining the momentum in the second half of the season. We should have plenty of trade talk — which, I think I want to see, at least, a nice middle-innings guy. I’d love to see a top-of-the-rotation guy (King Felix, you out there, maybe?) brought in, but that’s kind of wishful thinking.

OK, then…go Rangers!

Go ahead, parse this

Like them or not (and I usually don’t), the blowhards on right-wing talk radio succeed because they respect the views of their audience more than the progressives who despise them.

But they’re still blowhards, you see. Because he doesn’t like them, I’m guessing? Tell us more about caution against arrogance, Obi-wan. P.S. There’s an enormous amount of pixels surrounding that quoted bit you might want to read, just in case you’re a progressive looking for a hook.

What an idiot.

Says it all, no?

Rangers Activate Tommy Hunter, Launch Dave Bush Into The Sun

Old Dave Bush was the definitive emergency journeyman rubber-arm while he was here, and he deserves slightly better than catastrophic quantum dis-assembly. Hopefully, he’ll just have to go to Round Rock.

Really, too…31 years old, just banked a $1,000,000 check, sits in the BPiA bullpen most nights, chewing sunflower seeds, drinking Gatorade, eating off the cold-cut platter in the clubhouse, looking at Texas gals half the time (which needs to be put in the perspective of pitching for Milwaukee the previous 5 or six years, after growing up in Pittsburgh)…that sounds like a pretty dang nice life, even if he just hangs on at RR for the rest of the year. That’s why I always say, there’s nothing I’d rather be in life than a pitcher in Major League Baseball, even a not really great one.

In other news, a NL scout observes that Josh Hamilton can “field his position.”