I changed my tiny garage office around to accommodate some (free) office furniture, and I forgot, as drunks do, and when I stood up to go get another beer, I didn’t remember I should turn right instead of left, and I ran smack dab into the wall.

No I don’t have any lights on, except this screen, so I’m not only a drunken elderly person, I’m a nerd, too. I just wish I had some Doom to play. How’s that for elderly? You kids get off my lawn or I’ll pepper you with rock salt.

I wonder if I painted Joe Biden, nekkid, on my carport roof, could I get some national media attention?

IDIOCRACY

It’s here, folks.  It’s time for all us non-morons to pack up, go to Mexico, and take over down there (won’t be hard, they’re Mexicans, they’re used to shitty governments.)  Canada, if you don’t like sweating.  Because I just can’t take much more of this.

Senate to vote on rescue plan Wednesday - Sep. 30, 2008

The vote is scheduled for after sundown, in observance of the Jewish holiday.

Holidays are nice and all, but I’m not getting a big sense of urgency here. Do we have to go thru some ridiculous observance of Ramadan here in our own damn country next?

Because I expect, if we’re at the brink of some cataclysmic meltdown, like they’re all saying, I expect mofos to be working weekends, graveyard, Thanksgiving, and Christmas to fix it. I’ve done it to stop my meltdowns. No reason these jackasses can’t, none at all.

Oh, just so you don’t miss the freaking headline — the sainted Senate is going to vote on some version of some bailout. Big whoop.

There is literally something every day of my life that makes me think to myself that the Founding Fathers were utter geniuses. Today, it’s a divided legislative body. That right there is why I’m a conservative, ya know. Who’s gonna say they know better than those old dead white males?

Personally, I hope Harry Reid gets his ass handed to him. Nancy is still trying to figure out how to re-attach hers. Karl Rove, on some radio show I don’t listen to, had a rundown of all the Democrats who voted NO, and it’s freaking hilarious. I’ll see if I can find it…seems like half of them are beholden to old Eyebrows Pelosi in some way, and she still couldn’t get The Suckout passed. Last I checked, the Donkies had a majority, you know. Looks like bipartisanship might be working, to me, the schmuck.

Think Progress » Palin on which newspapers she reads: ‘Um, all of them.’

Three separate times, Couric tried to elicit a response from Palin about which specific newspapers she reads.

She probably doesn’t read any, idiots, unless some old fart left it on the bench.

News sources, my ass. Propoganda outlets is more correct. Specific ones, with names, don’t really matter, now, do they? They’re mostly gonna be gone in a few years, anyway, and the sooner, the better.

The bottom line is that only a moron would actually care what name is at the top of page A-1 carrying a bunch of wire stories.

A real paying customer too. Paying cost-minus, but who hasn’t bought a reference story?